Secret Shopper

Normally, I am a pretty laid back, quiet, non-carousing type of guy. But this weekend, I got license to have up to $75 worth of unadulterated and under-the-radar fun. How?

I got an alias.

It all started a few weeks ago, when I purchased a new bed at Sears. The mattress set was on sale for 50% off, plus an additional rebate. A pretty good deal, well in keeping with my mostly inconspicuous existence. However, the rebate was not to be mailed for 6-8 weeks. To be prudent, I've held off from depositing a few other checks (via mail to my online-only bank), so I could combine them with the $75 check to come. Well, it came tonight. But it wasn't actually a check.

The rebate came in the form of a pre-paid Mastercard debit card. (Interestingly enough, the instructions read that one must select 'credit' when using it).

Now, that's not terribly exciting in itself. But then Sarah pointed out the name imprinted on the card. There it was, revealed to me for the first time, my undercover alias: DAN ARMSTRANG.



What an opportunity! I could go crazy with this--head to the bar and run up a pretty decent tab; purchase a few more seasons of Gilmore Girls on DVD; go to Dollar Tree and leave with a veritable trove of slightly defective treasures; all without fear of public judgment! After all, any repercussions of such behavior would be hung around the neck of this ARMSTRANG character!

But alas, I did none of these things.

Instead, we headed to the mall and picked up some new additions to Sarah's work wardrobe. We did quite well, gathering a new sweater, blouse, tank tops and even a few new undershirts for me, and we didn't even use the entire card's value.

But, I must admit, I'm not entirely thrilled with the idea of some other guy buying my fiancee new clothes.