The Heroes of Nothingdom

Dr. Ed McSweegan

So, yesterday and today, I have spent most of my time doing nothing. Since Sarah has had to work pretty much full days, I have been here at her apartment with very little to do. I have no car, and even if I did, it is sooo cold here in Wheeling that I would probably not set even one foot outdoors. I've been watching lots of culinary television, both much of Food Network's lineup and Travel Channel's "No Reservations" and "Bizarre Foods."

While checking out CNN.com, my attention was caught by a story about a pioneer in similar circumstances to my own, the hero of all men who dream of making large amounts of money for doing little or no work, Charles Ponzi, namesake of the famous Ponzi Scheme. Interesting, for sure. But a link within that story led me to another interesting piece on four men, each of whom made large amounts of money by doing relatively little work. A CEO, an actor and a professional athlete each made the list. But the final entry is the one I would most aspire to be like. His name is Edward McSweegan, and he actually is quite accomplished. He holds a Ph.D. in microbiology and once oversaw the National Institute of Health's Lyme Disease program. In addition, he has penned several scientific works, and completed two science fiction novels. The kicker, though, is that he finished the final entries to that resume on the job, in his cushy office, while receiving a six-figure government salary. His tenure at NIH reads something like the plot of a Seinfeld episode, an amalgam of George Costanza's wildest ambitions and Kramer's bass-ackwards falling into luck. A true American hero.

Special message from Superman

Here's a video I didn't really have anything to do with. Well, I guess I was one of the collaborators on the script, and I stood there out of the shot while we filmed it Tuesday night. Anyway, hopefully it will encourage some of those people on the fence as to whether or not they want to freeze to death for a few hours Friday night to watch the Dukes fight their way toward the national championship game. Remember, the game is also on ESPN2.

T(V) Zone

The highlight of my typical workday has become my lunch hour. Usually, when noon rolls in, I close my office door, grab whatever delicacy I've brought, and tune into some TV program online. This routine has been made necessary by the move to our new office. You see, our old location was about three minutes away form my apartment, even with traffic, so it was very convenient for me to go home and catch a little TV while I ate. Our new office downtown has quadrupled or quintupled my average commute, so I've been forced to start partaking of my lunch at the office.

After about the first week of noon-hour TV withdrawal, I decided to investigate some online options. That's when I found the complete 4th season of LOST online at abc.com. That worked great for me, since I had finished off the third season DVDs a few weeks before, and had not seen any fourth season yet (the 4th season DVDs are out now). With the new 5th season premiering in January (ABC also has a sneak peek online), I voraciously consumed those 14 episodes at lunch and on weekends. Of course, after I finished that off, I was SOL on lunchtime entertainment. I scoured hulu for a new series to get hooked on.

But, one large problem with online TV is that networks typically only will release online the episodes of the current season of a series at any one time, usually about a week after it has aired on old-fashioned TV. In the case of LOST, in its off-air cycle, ABC posted the entire fourth season, I imagine to bolster interest in the upcoming season, and also to continue its fairly innovative 'viral'-type marketing approach to the show. Thus, for me, the only shows that have great appeal to watch online (apart from current episodes I just might have missed on original airing) are ones of which I've seen all the episodes leading up to what is currently online (as in my experience with LOST) or shows still in their first season. Of course, some people may enjoy re-watching episodes they've seen before (I do do this sometimes). Anyway, as you can imagine, my picky criteria made it fairly difficult for me to find a new dish to feed my entertainment appetite. I thought I had found the perfect combo in FOX's "Fringe"--it is in its first season, with all of the existent episodes online at fox.com (one of few new shows to have lasted long enough to do so). On top of that, it is another project of super-producer JJ Abrams, creator of LOST (among other shows).

However, my love affair with that show (a sortof combination of X-Files and some lousy cop show, like 'Bones' or something), lasted about 2 minutes, and was wholly without love. I clicked on the pilot episode, and immediately could tell it was no good. So there that went. This disappointment led me into a period of desperate and depressing searching for a new show. FOX did have a few newer episodes of "House, M.D." I'd missed, but that only lasted a day or two. Again, I was *lost.* I checked out the rest of ABC (sorry, I just couldn't bring myself to try 'Brothers and Sisters' or 'Pushing Daisies'). Then I looked at CBS' offerings. After being initially unimpressed with their displays for about a half-dozen incarnations of "CSI," "Two and a Half Men," "Survivor 10,000: Venusian Crater" or whatever, and "How I Met Your Mother," I stumbled upon link titled "TV Classics." 'Why not?' I thought. Then, I saw it. A hidden gem.

Now this find was remarkable for two reasons: a) the point of this log, to find a lunchtime replacement, and b) I can finally fill in (most of) the gaps in my T-Zone viewing history. The package online is missing a few episodes, but thus far I've watched a few episodes I'd previously gone without, including season 1's "Execution" today. It's a moderately stupid and predictable one, focusing around an 1880s Wild-West, ruthlessly killing cowboy, who's being strung up for his murders. At the last moment, he is mysteriously transported to the 1960's by a scientist. Needless to say, unavoidable conflict and a fair amount of hilariously bad acting follow, all leading up to a predictable ironic twist. Final tally: 2 stars--not the best, but certainly not the worst. At least it didn't make me lose my soup.

***UPDATE On another TV note, Virginia's pride, the JMU Dukes, will play Montana in the FCS (formerly Division I-AA) semifinals in a game to be shown on ESPN 2. The game is particularly interesting as it is a rematch of the 2004 FCS national championship game, which JMU claimed. Scheduled for 8 p.m. (ET), Friday, the game will be played at JMU (so I'm planning on going and, if I'm lucky enough to sit next to my boss's incredibly photogenic 12-year-old son again,) I may just get my mug on standard-plus cable. Good exposure for the school, too, I guess.

awesome, pt. 2

Not only does this offer insightful political satire, but the star-studded cast is really kind of incredible. from funnyordie.com

awesome

Normally, I would just let the people who regularly visit sites like failblog find this for themselves, but I found this clip noteworthy for two reasons: 1) When I see a soccer fail clip queued up in the player, I expect a standard kick in the junk or maybe a horrendous knee contortion. This took me off guard. 2) The maneuver which the offensive player is executing is actually awesome, as you can see after the initial hilarity.

And, yes, I watched this at work. And it brought tears of humor to my eyes.